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The Space Between Us (2017)

His Review:

Gardner is a very unique teenager.  He was born in East Texas and his mother died during childbirth.  This might not seem so unique, except the East Texas Gardner was born in is on Mars.  Gardner is the first person ever to live solely on another planet and now he is headed to Earth to meet the only person he has ever cared for, a girl named Tulsa (Britt Robinson).

Sounds like a pretty neat story right?  Well, the people who made this movie managed to make a movie that is devoid of real feelings and emotion.  This movie plays out as if a 14 year old is writing in their diary.  The main character if Gardner couldn’t be more boring if he tried and the supporting cast is simply getting a paycheck.  The first half of the movie is matter-of-fact and pretty much just sets the stage for a cheesy and laughable 2nd half that has little excitement and what I can only guess to be a sex scene.  I was bored watching this movie and there is no way I can recommend this movie to anyone.

4/10 Stars – It might touch the souls of people under the age of 10, but this movie is boring, emotionless, and laughable.

Logan (2017)

His Review:

The year is 2029 and there hasn’t been a new mutant born in nearly 25 years.  Logan (Hugh Jackman) has aged quite a bit and contemplates ending his life many times, but since he takes care of Professor Xavier (Patrick Stewart), he still has purpose.  When a strange woman comes to him and begs him to take a girl named Laura (Dafne Keen) to North Dakota, Logan blows her off, but when he learns that this girl has his genetic DNA, he finally feels a connection that pushes him to live.

Logan is based off the comics Old Man Logan and is focused on Logan when he is much older and the X-Men are no more.  The story has some action, but the focus now is on a beaten and broken man who is ready for his life to be over.  Logan doesn’t care about anything and simply drifts through life.  Charlies Xavier is still there for him allowing him to be strong, but Charles is near death himself and can only do so much.  The addition of this young girl allows Logan to have purpose and to fight for something since he experienced the same life that she may face.  Just like any “parent,” Logan decides to fight for a better life for Laura.  A life that he wasn’t allowed to have.  He becomes instinctual and doesn’t let anything get in his way.

As far as a movie goes, Logan isn’t a “superhero” movie like the X-Men films were.  This movie is a drama with action sequences scattered around at key points.  It looks at the inter-turmoil that Logan now experiences day to day and the fact that he doesn’t care about anything.  This movie is very violent when it comes to the action, and it is very R rated.  Let’s just say that there are many scenes where Logan’s claws go inside another human graphically and limbs are removed.  Just like Deadpool, this is not a kid-friendly movie so parents beware.

Soap box time:  Wolverine is my favorite superhero.  Period.  I grew up as a child of the 90s with the 90s X-Men being my comic of choice.  I love him in the comics and in the animated series and Hugh Jackman was a great Logan.  He, however, was never Wolverine.  Wolverine wears a yellow and black uniform and Hugh Jackman never wore the iconic suit that made Wolverine recognizable.  I still to this day have no idea why the X-Men never looked like they did in the comics because it kept me from fully identifying with the characters but since Logan was just a man, Hugh Jackman pulled that part off greatly.  I did like how they addressed the “X-men Comics” as being an exaggeration of the real mutants and that “Wolverine” was a fictional character based on his life.  I still don’t like that Jackman never became Wolverine, but I’m glad it was mentioned.

Overall, my impression of Logan was that this movie is a great send off for Patrick Stewart and Hugh Jackman.  These men carried a torch for many years and this will be their legacy.  Having said that, Logan is a good film, but because of the dreary setting and the grungy nature of the characters, I didn’t love it.  I never like the “babysitting story lines” in movies and the 11 year old girl just didn’t do it for me.  I didn’t care about her character and felt that her being just like Logan was too boring.  Having said that, this movie is a touching look at the last remaining X-Men characters and will please many movie goers, even if it is sad and depressing.  Co-starring Boyd Holbrook, Stephen Merchant, and Elizabeth Rodriguez.

7/10 Stars – A gritty, sad, and realistic look into a character Hugh Jackman brought to life, even if he never really became Wolverine.

 

 

Rings (2017)

His Review:

Have you ever heard about the video that can kill people?  After you watch it, you get a phone call that says you have 7 days to live, that is unless you make a copy of the video and pass on the death sentence to someone else.  In the case of Julia (Matilda Anna Ingrid Lutz) and Holt (Alex Roe), they are in love, but have to separate due to going to college, but when Holt won’t return Julia’s calls, she decides to investigate what is going on.  Learning that Holt and a large group of students at his school watched the video, Julia decides to watch Holt’s copy to save him from the horrors that await him, but when her video ends up being completely different, she knows she must learn more about Samara’s horrifying story to save herself.

For those of you that don’t know, this is the 3rd movie in a franchise started back in 2002 with The Ring.  The Ring is a high praised horror movie about a video tape that kills people after you watch it and for the longest time I thought it sounded stupid.  I finally saw it and made fun of it the whole time for being so ridiculous, but as time went on and my horror fandom grew, I allowed myself to appreciate it.  I never did see the 2nd movie, and maybe I should, but this movie has very little to do with the original 2 films except the main concept itself.

I guess knowing this movie has a 9% on Rotten Tomatoes kept me from seeing it for some time, but I finally took the plunge and I must say that this movie wasn’t as bad as expected.  Obviously this movie has its flaws but it also has plenty of moments that will keep you entertained and interested and to me that is what a movie’s purpose is.

The first 30 minutes of this movie is almost a direct copy of the first movie which isn’t a very good start since we all saw the first movie and it was great.  It has the same opening scene (this time on a plane), and all the same concepts floating around.  The first 30 minutes could have been explained in a recap and saved us our time.  The problem I see surrounding this is that the movies was only 90 minutes already, so the script was already too short to cut out any story elements so they rehashed old plot elements.  Sadly to say, this probably turned a lot of people off before a pretty good 2nd half.

The 2nd half of Rings reminded me of the 2nd half of The Ring.  I know I just said this about the first half too, but the investigation into the new video to find out more about Samara’s past is pretty interesting.  Sure, it doesn’t go as deep as the original but it could have been much worse.  It is what it is and if you can survive to the end, it will be worth it… if you are a huge fan of the original, that is.

As far as the horror aspect goes, nothing in this movie is going to scare you if you saw the original.  You have already seen everything that would freak you out and The Ring did it much better.  I didn’t care because I already figured this movie wasn’t going to scare me and I came to terms with that, but the mystery is what kept me interested.  Take that how you will, but look at this movie as a mystery instead of a horror and you will be ok.

At the end of the day, this movie isn’t as bad as I was expecting but it wasn’t great either.  It is simply ok, and I hope that this movie acts as a bridge into more sequels and hopefully better movies.  If so, then Rings has a greater purpose and it will matter more, unlike the 2nd movie which I didn’t see and am totally assuming at this point.  Ha.  Co-starring Johnny Galecki, Vincent D’Onofrio, Amiee Teegarden and Boonie Morgan.

6/10 Stars – This short tale with rehashed plot points doesn’t do this movie any favors, but the 2nd half is surprisingly interesting if you look at it as a mystery and not a horror.

Fist Fight (2017)

His Review:

Teachers Strickland (Ice Cube) and Campbell (Charlie Day) work at a high school where the kids call the shots and rule over authority.  When hot head Mr. Strickland goes postal on a group of students with an ax, chopping up desks, weak and dorky Mr. Campbell is force to tattle on him which gets him fired.  Now Mr. Strickland is furious and challenges Mr. Campbell to a fist fight after school… yup, a fist fight.

Based on the premise alone, I thought this movie would be terrible, then I watched it and laughed my ass off.  First thing to point out is that this movie is very rated R.  It is in the same vein as Horrible Bosses and Bridesmaids in terms of content.  Charlie Day and Ice Cube are so over the top polar opposites that they click, but it is the supporting cast that makes this movie funny.  Tracy Morgan, Jillian Bell, and Kumail Nanjiani add the extra flair that kept me laughing scene after scene.  Now, don’t get me wrong, there are many moments that had me rolling my eyes, but that isn’t the point of the movie.  This movie is designed to make you laugh and if you like adult humor with plenty of crazy moments, then this is what you need.  Watch it!  Co-starring Alexa Nisenson, Christina Hendricks, Dean Norris, JoAnna Garcia Swisher, and Dennis Haysbert.

7/10 Stars – Sure the story is dumb, but the cast does a great job at keeping us laughing and that is the point!

Resident Evil: The Final Chapter (2017)

His Review:

When the Red Queen tells Alice (Milla Jovovich) that she is humanity’s last hope before the fall of mankind in 48 hours, she is instructed to return to the Hive in Raccoon City when she can find the answers she is seeking.  Dr. Isaacs (Iain Glen) and Albert Wesker (Shawn Roberts) are on the side of the evil Umbrella corporation and must stop her before she is able to rid the world of the T-Virus once and for all.

The Final Chapter is the 6th installment into the Resident Evil franchise over a 15 year period and boy am I glad this crap is over!  If you read my review for the first movie, you know damn well that I am a huge fan of the video games (except 5 and 6) and this franchise does not do the series justice.  When the first movie came out, the franchise had about 4-5 games to its name.  It was definitely BEFORE Resident Evil 4 changed the landscape of the series into action instead of horror.  I blame this stupid movie franchise for destroying what Resident Evil use to be.

As far as a movie goes, the Final Chapter (which I don’t buy for a second) is more of the same.  Run away from the zombies, blow up the zombies, shoot at the zombies, don’t die when it is obvious the zombies should eat you… you know the drill.  The story is convoluted with plenty of “clone” talk that will confuse the heck out of anyone who is remotely trying to pay attention.  If you are lucky enough to follow along, then you know already that this story is bogus and stupid and that nothing positive can come from watching this regurgitated crap over and over.  Co-starring Ali Larter, Eoin Macken, Fraser James, Ruby Rose, Ever Anderson and William Levy.

4/10 Stars – It isn’t the weakest in the series, but when you are at #6 and it feels exactly the same as all the others, there isn’t anything more you can do to make we want to keep watching.

 

xXx: The Return of Xander Cage (2017)

Tuesday, March 14, 2017

His Review: Xander Cage (Vin Diesel) is back in action after Augustus Gibbons (Samuel L. Jackson) is killed by a falling satellite.  A device known as Pandora’s Box…

The Space Between Us (2017)

Saturday, March 11, 2017

His Review: Gardner is a very unique teenager.  He was born in East Texas and his mother died during childbirth.  This might not seem so unique, except the…

Logan (2017)

Saturday, March 11, 2017

His Review: The year is 2029 and there hasn’t been a new mutant born in nearly 25 years.  Logan (Hugh Jackman) has aged quite a bit and contemplates…

Rings (2017)

Friday, March 3, 2017

His Review: Have you ever heard about the video that can kill people?  After you watch it, you get a phone call that says you have 7 days…

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